Monday, May 18, 2009

As promised....

It's now Monday morning, and I'm writing in my blog. :-)

I had a delightful weekend!!!

Dinner and drinks with friends on Friday night, a softball game (which we lost 18-10 - BOO!) on Saturday afternoon, a dance recital Saturday night, immediately followed by a birthday celebration in Boston.

Sunday afternoon I was scheduled to have two softball games, but because of the rain we got overnight on Saturday and the fact that the fields have horrible drainage (that sounds gross) all Sunday games were cancelled. Instead of softball, Jim and I stopped over to visit his parents, went grocery shopping and then went to a graduation party for a friend who just graduated from college. We had a GREAT time at the graduation party - especially Jim (I was driving).

And I'll leave it at that.

Unfortunately, it's quite cold out, which means that my softball game tonight is most likely not going to be a very fun experience. Weather issues aside, we're playing the team that beat us on Saturday, so it's time for a little payback. I'm hoping that will be incentive enough to keep our spirits up, and the bats going!!!

I just finished reading the book 'Snuff' by Chuck Palahniuk (Fight Club, Choke, Rant) which is basically the story of a female porno star who's making a movie in which she'll have sex with 600 men. It's a satire/comedy and focuses on three of the 600 men, as well as the star's personal assistant. It was a very quick read, and quite funny.

One of the funniest things is that throughout the book, he (the author) came up with a ton of fake porno movie titles.

Since I CLEARLY have way too much time on my hands, I kept track of them and I'm listing them here for your enjoyment.

Again...all the credit goes to Mr. Palahniuk for these...some of which had me laughing out loud on the train. :-)

Sex With The City
Lust Horizons
Emergency Room Back Door Dog Pile
Titanic Back Door Dog Pile
Ford’s Theatre Back Door Dog Pile
– later released as Private Box – later re-released as Presidential Box
The Da Vinci Load
To Drill A Mockingbird
The Postman Always Cums Twice
Chitty Chitty Gang Bang
The Twilight Bone
A Tale of Two Titties
The Wizard of Ass
Gropes of Rath
World Whore One: Deep in the Trenches
World Whore Two: Island Hopping
Moby Dicked
A Midsummer Night’s Ream
Much Adieu About Humping
The Twelfth Knight
Snack Attack
Lassie Cum, Now!
World Whore Three: The Whore to End All Whores
On Golden Blonde
The Ass Menagerie
Catch Her in the Eye
A Separate Piece
Bang the Bum Slowly
Butt Pirates of the Caribbean
Smokey and the Ass Bandit
Beat Me in St. Louis
Ali Boobie and the 40 D’s
Lay Misty For Me
The Importance of Balling Earnest
Lady Windermere’s Fanny
The Blow Jobs of Madison County
Snow Falling on Peters
Guess Who’s Coming at Dinner
– later released as Black Cock Down
Twat on a Hot Tin Roof - later released as Slut on a Hot Tin Roof – later re-released as Cunt on a Hot Tin Roof
The Italian Hand Job
The World’s Biggest Gang Bang
Three Days of the Condom
The Handmaid’s Tail
The Asshole Jungle
– later released as How Reamed Was My Valley – later re-released as Inside Miss Jean Brodie
Angels With Dirty Places
Sperms of Endearment
The Miracle Sex Worker
From Her to Eternity
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nuts
The Bad Juiced Bears
Frisky Business
– later released as Lay Misty for Me

Happy Monday!!!

1 comment:

cb said...

Personally I like the Harry Pooter/Twatter series. Sorcerers Bone. Dungeon of secrets. Prisoner of Ass-kaban. Order of the Penis. Etc.

And of course the "Cum Hard" series. Cum Hard with a Vengeance, etc.